My gf is bullying me, what can i do?

My gf is bullying me I know this sounds dumb but what can I do, in the past ive been really nasty to her at times and so on and am very sorry for that. Now 4 months on i dont fight with her dont sware at her nothing at all, when we argue which can be a lot she calls me a mongo retard looser prick, sometimes tells me am good for nothing everyone hates me and a looser,, I know this sounds stupid but feels like am getting bullied when shes calling me this I dont respond n dont call her anything back, the truth is I love her to bits and cant imagine spending my life with anyone else am on the brink of ending my life , help me please